This new year, have a closing ceremony

December ends with many of us in a frenzy…not just from the holidays but from the pressure we put on ourselves to set goals for the coming new year.  For many years, I would sit down with a blank notebook and stare at the vast “blankness” of the page…a blank slate upon which to dream and vision what the coming year would bring for me.  I’d make a list of my intentions that would make “The Dream” a reality.

I’d start the year off with the proverbial bang, affirming my intentions every morning and checking-off the little boxes on my to-do list of actions…moving me one step closer to “The Dream”.

And then, around the 25th of January, I would begin skipping the morning affirmations.  I wouldn’t even look at my fancy new planner with the little boxes to check-off as actions were completed.  “The Dream” would get buried under the mundane tasks of daily life.  That is…until the end of December when the whole cycle would start again.  Pretty depressing.

But last year, I decided to take a different approach.

I decided to have a “closing ceremony”.

Yes…similar to the Olympics, I decided to celebrate the losses and victories of the year that had just passed…to honor my mistakes and my accomplishments…to recall all the emotionally charged moments–good and bad–from the past year.  I thought about the conflicts I’d had with others…the times when my words and actions fell short of reflecting my highest and best self.  I also thought about all the loving and joyful interactions I’d had with the people in my life.

By doing this, I reviewed the lessons I needed to learn and saw things about myself that I hadn’t realized before.  I addressed the hidden reservations and unconscious agendas that had sabotaged “The Dream” in the last year…so they wouldn’t sabotage it again in the coming year.

In short, I contemplated the 12 months…the 52 weeks…the 365 days that had passed, acknowledged all that had happened and all that hadn’t…and released them.  By clearing out the old year, I made space for the new one just beginning.

Yes…a closing ceremony makes all the difference.

Have your own this year and connect with me to let me know how your closing ceremony went.  I’d love to hear from you.

Wishing you joyful new year,

Dr. Avanti

It’s the end of the world as we know it…why you should feel fine.

“It’s the end of the world as we know it…and I feel fine.” -REM

Catchy tune from the 80’s.  It’s been on repeat in my head for the last month.  I woke up this morning and it’s the first thing I said to myself, my husband…my kids…who tried not to laugh at my very off-key singing.

And despite the fact that I’ve been singing those words since I first heard the song in high school, it dawned on me that until the past month, I’ve never actually stopped to think about the words and what they mean.

December 21, 2012.  The end of the Mayan calendar.  The end date of 5,125- year-long cycle that would be marked by cataclysmic events that would cause the end of the world we live in.  Throughout 2012 you’ve probably heard various doomsday prophecies that have captured the world’s attention and imagination.  Hardly anything to “feel fine” about.

So why do “I feel fine”?  And why should you “feel fine”?

Because December 21, 2012 is “the end of the world as we know it”…not the end of the world.

It’s the beginning of an extraordinary spiritual awakening, a shift in the collective consciousness of humanity.  It’s an evolution to a higher vibration from the current limited and fear-based existence of humans on Earth filled with the low vibration of violence, conflict, war and struggle.  It’s the start of a new era in which we begin to see beyond the illusion of separation from others and instead see the reality of a world connected by a web of relationships…or “oneness”.

It’s the beginning of a kinder, more peaceful and loving world…and I feel fine.

That’s your Rx for today.  Be well.

Dr. Avanti

Albert Einstein, Marianne Williamson…and the Sikh Temple Shooting in Wisconsin

I’ve spent much of the past 12 hours thinking deeply about the tragic events that took place today at the Gurdwara (“Sikh temple”) in Oak Creek, Wisconsin.

What happened today was tragic at so many levels…tragic because my family and friends belong to the sangat (“congregation”) of the Oak Creek Gurdwara…tragic because it was an act of violence in a place of worship…tragic because it was an act of violence that will not only affect the victims and their families, but will forever affect all of humanity.

Albert Einstein once said “the most important decision we make is whether we believe we live in a friendly or hostile Universe.”

Today it probably seems that we live in a hostile Universe…where fear is the basis of most human interaction.  Fear of people from other cultures, fear of people who dress differently…fear of people with different beliefs.

But do we really live in a hostile Universe…filled with fear?

Or is the hostile Universe simply an illusion- behind which the friendly Universe is hidden away?  Perhaps the friendly Universe is “a world beyond the world we see with our physical eyes”, as Marianne Williamson wrote in her book, A Return to Love.

Perhaps the hostile Universe we experienced today is one in which people don’t feel love…because the world has become a loveless place for them.  And where love is absent, fear is present.

Perhaps replacing fear with love is the way to uncover the friendly Universe…a Universe in which acts of violence like those today at the Sikh Gurdwara in Oak Creek would not happen.

Perhaps love is the answer.

That’s your Rx for today.  Be well.

Dr. Avanti

The Fork in the Road…you never know what your choice will mean until you have lived it

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I–I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.

The roads that diverged in Robert Frost’s poem, did so at a fork in the road.

At the fork in the road, you have a choice of paths.

The path you choose triggers something within your spiritual being that then shapes the course of your human experience.

But.   You never know what your choice will mean until you have lived it.  You never know where your choice will lead you until you have lived it.  You will never know why a choice presents itself to you until you have lived it.

So…why do you worry about whether you made the “right” choice.  Why do you worry about what will happen?  Why do you continue to believe that you have control over the how?

Why not just trust that the path you choose at the fork in the road, whichever path it is, will be the path you are supposed to choose?

That’s your Rx for today.  Be well.

-Dr.Avanti

We Are Spiritual Beings Having a Human Experience

The wisdom of these words took my breath away when I heard them today.

“We are spiritual beings having a human experience.”

Most of us are programmed from an early age to believe that we are human beings that, if lucky enough, will have a spiritual experience during our lifetime.  We believe that we are defined by our humanity…by our bodies and our minds…and it is this belief that limits us from understanding our own limitless-ness.

Our spiritual beings choose to have a human experience, inside of a physical body on this earth, to learn things that cannot be learned any other way.  When we remember that we are more than our human form, that we are formless spiritual beings, we understand that we are one with the limitless source of the universe.

And that’s when coincidence becomes cosmic synchronicity…that’s when “luck” becomes divine grace…that’s when life becomes a spiritual journey.

That’s your Rx for today.  Be well.

-Dr. Avanti

Why Meditation is Good Medicine

Yup…meditation is good medicine.  Actually it’s the best medicine out there.

It has no side effects, it doesn’t cost anything and you don’t need a prescription or a pharmacy for it.  You can prescribe it to yourself.

And if you use meditation everyday…if you sit still and get quiet enough…you will begin healing yourself.

Because you’ll be able to hear yourself without all the noise of the world.  You’ll hear your “inner m.d.”- your inner advisor – that knows what you need to heal yourself.

You’ll know if you need rest or nourishing food.  You’ll know if you need the advice of an allopathic physician or that of a shaman.  You’ll know if you need to feel your emotions more or love more or forgive more.

You’ll know what will help ease your symptoms of pain…or sadness…or anger…or fear.

And that’s when your healing will begin.

That’s your Rx for today.  Be well.

-Dr. Avanti

Making Peace With My 13-Year-Old Self

It’s that time of year…new notebooks, new clothes, new teachers…back to school…

You would think that after the years and years of school that I’ve gone through that I’d be less nostalgic about this time of year.  But something about the new school year still excites me.  Maybe it’s that in some ways September, rather than January, still feels like the start of a new year.  Maybe it’s the memory of my parents telling me “great things will happen this year” and the feelings these words still evoke inside of me.

But…if I’m really honest…this time of year also evokes feelings of anxiety and insecurity inside of me.  The feelings that came from not knowing what the new school year would bring.  Of not knowing if I’d be able to keep up with the work in my classes while playing sports and being involved in clubs.  Of not knowing if my friends from last year would still like me this year…of not knowing if I’d have anyone to eat lunch with.

Funny isn’t it…how those feelings of anxiety and insecurity can follow you from the age of thirteen to the age of forty?  The memories of the junior high school girls who made fun of me because my mom wouldn’t let me shave my legs or because I was more interested in books than boys still haunt me.

But then I remember…I’m not thirteen anymore…and I don’t mind eating lunch by myself.

That’s your Rx for today.  Be well.

-Dr. Avanti

Forgiveness is a Gift…To You.

Today is my birthday-not just another birthday, but a milestone birthday…my 40th birthday.  I have spent the 365 days since my last birthday anticipating this day and thinking about my life thus far…where I have been, where I want to go…where I am now.

And here’s what I have realized over the past 365 days of self-reflection…I have realized that every birthday brings with it, another year of life’s lessons.  I have realized that birthdays, like the start of a new year, can symbolize new beginnings…and that birthdays can also be moments of personal closure that release us from the past…both of which lead to the discovery of our authentic selves.

The past 365 days have been a series of new beginnings for me…the past 365 days have also been a series of moments of personal closure for me…closure on 40 years of resentments, sadness, anger, blame…forgiving and letting go…releasing me from the bonds of the past that have prevented me from living in the present.

It hasn’t been easy…it’s actually been a painful and sometimes very difficult process…a process that I have actively avoided for most of my life.

Because the process of forgiving and letting go requires that you change your old ways of thinking, being and acting so you can begin to think, be and act in the ways that will support your authentic self rather than who you have been in the past.  The process of forgiving and letting go requires that you send and radiate love to everyone who has hurt you or harmed you or embarrassed you or abandoned you.

Forgiveness is an act that takes place in your own mind as it really has nothing to do with the other person.  Forgiveness is an act of love for yourself because when you forgive, you leave the past where it belongs–in the past.  And you allow yourself to live in the present.

And that…is the greatest gift you can give…to you.  Happy Birthday.

That’s your Rx for today.  Be well.

-Dr. Avanti

3 Tips to Clear Your Clutter. From the Inside Out.

When you think of clutter you probably think of “stuff”…lots of stuff that fills your closets and cabinets and lots of stuff that covers your desk, your counters and even your floor.  Too much stuff that you don’t need or don’t want.

So how do you get rid of all this clutter?  Do you just stock up on more plastic storage bins to organize the stuff?  If your answer is yes…does this approach work?  Does the clutter disappear?  Or does the clutter go away for a few hours or a few days and then come back multiplied?  Do you feel that despite your attempts to clear the clutter, you never seem like you are getting anywhere?

Well, maybe you’re not getting anywhere because you’re trying to fix the wrong problem the wrong way.  Because the clutter doesn’t start on your desk or in your closet.  The clutter starts inside of you.  If you realize that your exterior world is a reflection – a mirror – of your interior world, you will finally be able to clear the clutter in your life.

Here are 3 tips to clear your clutter from the inside out.

1. Start with the Mirrors.  Don’t just dive into the first pile of “stuff” you see on the floor.  First, take a look around your home to see what seems cluttered.  Accept that the clutter is there to teach you something valuable.  Then answer this question in a journal:  “If my environment were a reflection – or mirror – of what is going on in my head and in my life, what would it be saying?”.  Do you have multiple unfinished projects on your desk?  Perhaps this reflects a fear of making decisions.  Do you have piles of clothes covering every surface in your bedroom?  Perhaps this reflects a fear of intimacy.  Write down everything you think of, regardless of how crazy it seems.

2. Identify Something Small.  Now pick one small cluttered area of your home to address first.  Not a whole floor or a whole room…one small area…a closet shelf, a drawer…even a small counter surface.  Set a timer for 20 minutes, and using a pad of paper, write down the items you see in that small area and rate each item on a scale of one to three: 1-I love it or absolutely need it, 2-I’m not sure if I love it or need it, 3-I don’t love it or don’t need it anymore.  Now look at the items you gave a “3” and answer the following question in your journal: “If eliminating these things from my life would make space for something more important, what would I want?”.  Perhaps you are looking at your home office desk and decide that multiple cups of pens and pencils, two staplers, and the piles of papers and mail scattered across your desk make it difficult for you to concentrate on writing your blog.  You might decide that you would eliminate many of these items from your desk to make to room express your full creative potential.  Remember, when you remove something from your life that no longer serves you, you make room for something better and new.

3. Sort It.  Clear It.  Polish It.  Now that you’ve identified what you will gain in your life by making space, you are ready to act.  Schedule 30 minutes a day to tackle your “small area” and make it a non-negotiable appointment on your calendar.  Get three empty boxes and label them “Remove”, “Repair”, and “Recycle”.  Now start sorting.  Consider every item that is in your “small area” and ask yourself if you love it or need it.  If the answer is no, then ask yourself if you can repair it so you can love it/use it again or if you can recycle it so someone else can love it/use it.  If you can’t repair it or recycle it, then remove it to the trash.  Once you have sorted everything into your three boxes, clear the items out of your home.  Take your “remove” items to the trash, get your “repair” items fixed and donate, give-away or sell your “recycle” items.  Now that you have cleared out everything that is no longer adding value to your life, it’s time to “polish” and beautifully arrange the things that are left.  When you polish something, you give it a glow and a feeling of quality and importance.  Take the time to make your things beautiful and easily accessible so they support your life and delight your senses.

By clearing your clutter from the inside out, you remove the attachments to things from the past that no longer serve you that must be released in order to create the space for change.

That’s your Rx for today.  Be well.

-Dr. Avanti

Spring Cleaning- Start with the Mirrors

Ever since I can remember, the idea of “spring cleaning” has thrilled me.  When I was younger it meant organizing my bedroom, my closets and my cabinets.  It was an activity I associated with the return of flower buds and chirping birds…the time of transition from the cold of winter to the warmth of summer…the time of renewal and possibility.  Spring cleaning was my chance to clean and clear the physical clutter around me and start fresh.

And then I got older…and got a “real” job…and got married…and had children.  And the clutter got more significant and more overwhelming.  Despite all of my attempts to clear the clutter, I never felt like I was getting anywhere.  And I was right.  I wasn’t getting anywhere because I was trying to fix the wrong problem the wrong way.

The clutter wasn’t just the wedding gifts I had never used or the stuffed animal zoo in my daughter’s bedroom.  No.  The clutter had grown from simple physical clutter to clutter in every aspect of my life…too many obligations, too many activities, too much information…too many voice messages, text messages and emails…too much everywhere around me, all the time.  And so the solution for the clutter could never be found by giving away unused gifts or by getting more plastic storage bins for my daughter’s toys.

The clutter that had shown up in my exterior world hadn’t started on my desk or in my closet.  The clutter that had shown up had started inside me…inside my mind and in my thoughts and beliefs.  I realized that my outer environment was simply a reflection of my interior world and what was going on inside of me.  My mind was overwhelmed with the stress and responsibilities of being a medical resident and a mother of two young children and a wife and a daughter…and on and on.  I was chaotic and disorganized inside…and thus everything in my life was chaotic and disorganized…and filled with clutter.

It was this realization, that my exterior world was a reflection – a mirror – of my interior world, that changed how I viewed clutter.

So now when I do my “spring cleaning”, I start by cleaning and clearing my mind.  I look around my home to see what seems cluttered and I ask myself what inside of me is causing the clutter to appear.  I accept that the clutter is there to teach me something extremely valuable and then…my external space starts to shift.  Suddenly the excuses, of not having enough time to clean and not knowing where to start cleaning, are gone.  The indecision, of what to keep and what to give away, is gone.  The excuses and the indecision are gone because I have identified the true source of the clutter and tapped into the inner guidance that will clear the clutter away.

This week, why not try doing some “spring cleaning”?  Just remember to start with the mirrors.

That’s your Rx for today.  Be well.

-Dr. Avanti